Facemask Fridays and the Art of Filling Your Own Cup

Somewhere along the way, I stopped thinking of self-care as something you schedule and started thinking of it as something you weave into your life.

There was a time when I thought wellness had to look impressive. I imagined lengthy morning routines, expensive retreats, and people waking up before sunrise with enough energy to journal, meditate, run five miles, and somehow still have time to make green juice.

As it turns out, my version looks considerably less ambitious.

It looks like coffee.

It looks like hot yoga.

It looks like a ten-minute break in the sunshine between meetings.

And on Fridays, it looks like a face mask and absolutely no guilt about spending the evening horizontal.

Over the past few years, I've realized that the things that help me feel my best aren't necessarily grand gestures. They're the little rituals that quietly repeat themselves throughout the week. Individually, they don't seem particularly life-changing, but together they create something that feels a lot like balance.

Most mornings begin before the world starts asking things of me. I've learned that if I immediately reach for emails or social media, the day somehow belongs to everyone else before it has even begun. So I've slowly built a softer, yet structured, start.

I spend a few minutes writing in my Happiness Journal and checking into Gabby Bernstein's coaching & meditation app. I make my slightly ridiculous but beloved concoction of water with lemon, a pinch of salt, propolis, chlorophyll, and vitamin D drops. Somewhere in there, I read the day's passage from my Moon Calendar and pull an affirmation card because I enjoy beginning the day with intention, even if some mornings that intention is simply going through the motions.

Then comes coffee, which I consider both a necessity and a reward for beginning the day with mindfulness.

While I drink it, I move on to the fun stuff: usually tackle the New York Times games - specifically Mini Crossword, Pips, and Crossplay (in case anyone wants to play me) - and spend a few minutes practicing French via Duolingo. I’ve even turned on the settings to prevent social media app usage until le cours de francais est termine (aka, the French lesson is finished).

Movement has become another form of self-care for me, although I didn't always see it that way. For years, exercise felt tied to vanity and societal goals. These days, it feels much more connected to how I want to experience my life.

In this chapter of life, hot yoga three or four times a week gives me the reset I didn't know I needed. It literally embodies several of my favorite things - mindfulness, exercise, quiet time with myself, vibey music, and it’s come to feel like I’m in the sauna at a spa. I’ve also recently begun using the Ladder app from home to help me fit in strength workouts around everything else. I've discovered that consistency matters much more than perfection, which is fortunate because perfection and I have officially broken up, whereas consistency is tres Capricorn (moi).

Even my workdays have become opportunities for small moments of care. I keep vibey, yoga-esque music playing in the background, and our home is filled with crystals and non-toxic candles simply because they make me happy. Whether or not my crystals are charged or have the necessary treatment to elicit magic is inconsequential. I love them and that’s enough for me.

Whenever I can, I step outside for ten minutes of sunshine. It's amazing how much perspective fresh air can provide after staring at a computer screen all day. Also nature is cute and grounding so get out there!

And then there are Fridays.

Face mask Fridays began without much intention, other than since it’s a lighter meeting day generally speaking, slathering on a face mask of choice while knocking out responsibilities is excellent multitasking. If I really feel sassy, I also do a hair mask because why not? By the end of the week, there's something comforting about signaling to myself that work is done and the weekend has arrived.

My latest ritual is a Sunday bath, although I occasionally rebel against my own schedule and enjoy one on a random weekday afternoon instead. And I've returned to reading for fun, not self-improvement, and it’s made a world of difference.

Nothing is especially extraordinary about any of this.

Just a reminder that ordinary life deserves a little tenderness too, and self care can come in many forms, big and small.

Because perhaps self-care isn't really about escaping our lives.

Perhaps it's about creating lives that feel good to live in.

The Golden Standard

I've come to believe that wellness isn't found in perfection or discipline alone. More often, it's found in the small rituals that bring us back to ourselves.

A journal beside the coffee cup.

A yoga class after a stressful day.

A book before bed.

A bath in the middle of the week.

The little things may not seem significant in the moment, but over time they become the rhythm of our lives.

And that rhythm matters.

Save This For Later

• Self-care doesn't have to be elaborate to be meaningful.

• Build routines that support your real life, not an idealized one.

• Fresh air and movement solve more problems than we give them credit for.

• Stop saving nice things for someday.

• Ordinary days deserve beautiful rituals too.

• A Friday face mask can count as a personality trait.

Favorite Things

Browse my wellness favorites for:

The very best bathrobe

Morning rituals and journals

Books currently on my nightstand

Face masks I repurchase

Non-toxic candles

Wellness essentials including my water concoction

Fitness favorites

Little luxuries that make everyday life feel special

Shop with me here.

With love,

Jen